You would have experienced real tough times when your little one was a few months old, you would have had nightmares during your night feeds with your baby and then as toddlers you would have undergone their pranks and activities which would have tested your temper.
I must admit that those moments are something which you would cherish forever .However, for most of the families including you the word ‘teenager’ sends shock waves through the body. This is what is considered to be the most traumatizing and confusing phase in most of the parents lives.
Actually parenting can be the most fruitful work in your adult life. None of the other tasks and work can bring as much as joy and pride than bringing up a precious, loving and adorable child. I do believe that this would be accepted by almost all the parents. Each milestone in your child’s life has a specific set of goals and activities to be accomplished.
When your child is an infant it basically revolves around eating sleeping and playing a little while. When your child enters the adolescent stage, he or she tends to become independent and prefers to mix with friends of their age group. But the level and degree of independence is very significant and it is very important that as parents you decide on the level of independence to be given to your child. This at times can be smooth or can cause a great amount of stress and grief for the parents. But one thing that should be kept in mind is that this stress should not alarm you or cause unwanted tension.
The teen years are definitely a period of intense growth not physically but intellectually and it’s also understandable that it would be a time of confusion and upheaval for most of the parents. But you must also understand that this is the time that will help your child to grow into individuals who would be respected in the society in a later time frame.
Another aspect that has to be discussed would be as to when adolescence exactly starts. You must make your child understand that each one is unique and different from the other and there is a wide range of what should be considered as normal. Many of them misinterpret puberty to be adolescence. Well in one way the physical changes taking place is a signal that your child is turning to be an adult but there would be a whole load of internal changes taking place that need not be explicitly visible to you.
These changes are exactly what adolescence is. You can actually notice when your child enters the adolescence stage. Their behavior changes drastically and they start moving away from you and becoming more independent. They start to make note of their peers and try their level best to mingle with them. One more thing is that their decisions would be highly influenced by their friends and in fact more than your influence. They can go to the extent of changing their attire and looks for their friends which you may find awkward and hence giving rise to conflicts.
Here are Some Tips as to How You Should Go About Handling Your Child’s Teen Life.
With the advancements in technology and with the internet you can do a lot of reading and gather information on teenagers. Another thing that you should also do is recollect your teen life, the hardships and confusions that you underwent. You should also be mentally prepared to face the differences that would arise between you and your child and ensure that you understand their mood swings and if needed let them alone for some time.
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Put yourself in your kid’s place and give them the encouragement that it’s perfectly normal to be self conscious and independent. Help them understand that is it natural to feel like a grown up at one instant and a kid the next. One piece of advice that should be given a lot of importance is to think twice before you enter into a fight.
Raise objections on the most significant issues rather than trivial ones. Like for instance, if your kid is dressing up in the most awkward way then patiently explain as to how he or she would be looked upon by others .Find out the reason as to why he/she is dressing up like that. The more drastic thing your child can get involved could be drugs, alcohol etc. This is time you must enforce your right and help him or her to get out of it.
You could also open the channel of communication with your child early enough so that they would know what to expect during their teen years. You can make your kid feel comfortable and at peace when you share with them your teen experiences and I guess they have every right to know about their mum and dad. Let your child know what the family values and what you as parents consider best for your child.
Another important point that should be kept in mind is that, it is always advisable not to let your child know that he or she is being watched. You can achieve the same by getting to know their friends and friend’s parents. Regular communication with the friend’s parents will help you to keep a check on your kid’s activities and will help you to go a long way creating a very safe environment for your kid to grow in.
What is the Alarm Signal That You Should Look Out For In Your Kid
During the teen years you should be on the lookout for behavioral and personality changes in your child. For instance, skipping school or grades falling or doesn’t look fresh due to sleepless nights or even getting involved with the cops. These are the times during which they require your help and attention and please note that they may not explicitly ask for help. As parents you should understand their feelings and emotions and help them in times of trouble.
Finally you may be wondering as to when this confusion may fade away. Well I would say that it is a gradual natural process that will take time but the outcome would be to see your child as independent, responsible young adult soon. As parents you should work this out together and be confident that you would come out of this turmoil together and be proud that someday your kid is definitely going to make you proud.