Surrogate Pregnancy can be described as an arrangement between an infertile couple and the surrogate mother who will bear the couple’s fetus to term. There are two types of Surrogate pregnancy that can be opted depending on the circumstances – traditional surrogacy and gestational surrogacy.
In a traditional surrogacy, the surrogate mother will be required to donate her eggs, which will be impregnated by the father’s sperm through a medical procedure. In other words, the surrogate mother will also be the biological mother of the child. In a gestational surrogacy, the surrogate mother will carry the couple’s eggs, sperm or embryo from both the parents and will carry baby to term. In this case, the surrogate mother is not the biological mother.
Finding a surrogate mother is relatively easy nowadays. There are many surrogate agencies through which you can get a surrogate mother. Similar to adoption agencies, these agencies work along with lawyers and counselors who will suggest a surrogate mother based on the couple’s needs.
All surrogate mothers will undergo, medical and psychological examination to determine their physical and mental health condition. If the surrogate mother were going to be the natural mother of the child, then she would be made to undergo a battery of tests to ensure that she is healthy enough to sire a normal child.
All surrogate pregnancies that are arranged through agencies are sealed and bound by legal agreements that are drafted by qualified attorneys. However, there are many couples, who opt for volunteers, among their friends and families. Most often, these arrangements are comfortable for the couple, who find it easy to participate actively in the pregnancy along with the mother.
However it is advisable to get binding legal contracts with the surrogate mother before proceeding with the procedure. In a surrogate pregnancy, the couple will bear all the medical expenses of the surrogate mother, transportation charges, medicines and nutritional expenses. In some cases, the surrogate mother is also allowed to live with them and is also given a personal allowance.
This may not be possible in all cases, especially if the surrogate mother has children of her own. Most often couples, find it odd and unsure about the kind of relationship that they should have with the surrogate mother. Conflicting emotions are a part and parcel of such arrangements especially where the woman is concerned. Having an experienced surrogate mother in this case helps a lot. It also allays a lot of fears that the mother might have about such arrangements.
Treat the surrogate mother with respect and courtesy. Getting involved in the entire process right from the beginning is necessary and important for the couple. This will help them bond with the baby after it is born. Make sure you get periodic updates about the surrogate mother’s health and accompany her during ultrasound scan and doctor’s visit. This will also assure the surrogate mother that she is working with a loving couple who would take care of the baby well.
Remember that we do not necessarily become parents only by giving birth to the baby. Giving birth is just the first step of a long lifelong commitment to the child that you would raise. Do not fret about the fact that somebody else is carrying your baby. You will know that it was worth the effort when you hold your bundle of joy in your hands.